Yesterday I hosted an event that I have spent countless hours preparing for (Is it ever ok to end a sentence with a preposition..sometimes you can’t even help it). I not only spent time directly preparing for the event, but I have been thinking and thinking about it for years. I think it went ok and during I was like full energy and happy, not even nervous which was weird. Afterwards I came home and absolutely, positively crashed into my bed like bye bye…see you tomorrow at 6:30pm. This morning I woke up and thought, “ok, what’s next?” What the what, brain????? Did you not just see that I completed a YEARS in the making event? Give this body one small break, OK??

I am a Sagittarius sun, Capricorn moon and Aquarius rising. I also know that there are a lot of other things in my chart that go into play here, but I think that these three make a doozie of a combination. As a Sagittarius I need to know and do all the things and teach people all the things, as a Capricorn moon I’m like “What feelings? There is only work!” and my Aquarius rising tells me that there are deep transformations in our current systems that need to be revolutionized…but come on. I is tired.

So, let’s see what the cards have to say today. Yesterday I took the deck, “Sacred Mothers and Goddesses” By Claudia Olivos with me to pull a card before the event. I’ll just use that one again. I love the art on these cards. From the name you can already surmise that these are feminine energy inspired cards. All of the pictures are so comforting/empowering.

Shuffle, shuffle…”You gotta be kidding me”. Those are the words that just came out of my mouth. I am puzzled…I just drew the SAME card I drew yesterday morning and when I drew it I yesterday I was like “huh..I was expecting something different for today.”

The card: Artemis, Independence and Empowerment. Let’s read the meaning again. Maybe I am being hard headed and am not getting the hint.

Ok, y’all this is probably going to be a long one. So, I totally get this card today, I think. Recently I have been feeling overwhelmed with all the steps there are to making things happen. Want to do something? Complete these forty-seven steps first and have a million dollars to pay a coach and THEN you can make a few bucks on a side hustle. Ugh. Ugh. My Sagittarius nature does not like all of these stupid details and tasks! Let’s just DO IT already. Plus, why do I need to do something the way someone else does it for frick’s sake?

This card says, “Be aware of your power as a divine creature. You are sufficient and capable of doing anything you set your mind to.” “It’s nice to have companionship and emotional support, but you don’t need others to achieve your goals and reach your dreams.” Before these quotes the card states that Artemis was happy being in community and being alone or with her treasured animals. I can fully identify with this as well. I think that it is essential to have support for anything that you are working on, but I am down with this card because far too many times I have looked to other people or outside myself for answers to things or to “fix” me or my situation. I think it’s a common pitfall to think that there are gurus that know better than us when we all have our own inner guidance. I think life is a delicate balance of learning from others, going inside to check and see if what they teach you fits, and trusting yourself to go it alone sometimes. Oh, and rest..also rest sometimes.

Going back to my event and the many hours I have spent thinking and planning for that event. A lot of those were consulting other people about what I should do and then agonizing even more hours about whether I was “good enough” to pull this event off based on what feedback they gave me, not that the feedback wasn’t helpful. I gave other people way too much credit for being better than me or maybe even not human. My event went well and I did ok. I can trust me. I can rest knowing that.